


Chaos Theory

by Kereea



Series: The Chaos Verse [1]
Category: Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (2012), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Expanded Universe, For Want of a Nail, Friendship, Gen, Loki gets a conscience, Mental Health Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-01-26
Updated: 2017-05-21
Packaged: 2017-11-27 00:30:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/656035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kereea/pseuds/Kereea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki landed on Earth after his fall, specifically on Spider-Man. Curious about the teen hero, Loki soon finds himself with a sarcastic conscience while dark forces conspire.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1: Landing

Chapter 1: Landing

 

He didn’t know how long he’d been falling. It felt like a long time, but Loki was too smart to assume time flowed in an easily tracked method when one was in a vortex between the realms. 

He’d failed. Even after everything he’d done it was not enough. He was not enough.

After some span of time, how long he did not know, the vortex seem to shift. Loki reached out with his magic, trying to see what it was. There were places. One was cold, the other dark.

Neither was particularly appealing, for obvious reasons...Loki was tempted to try the cold. See if it was Jotunhiem, if he could die in the realm he’d been born in…

But the other, the dark one…there was something about it. Something that piqued his curiosity. Loki tried to see better only to be catapulted towards it.

.o.o.o.

“Come on, Shocker, you’re off your game tonight!” Spider-Man mocked, trying to get close enough to web his opponent’s weapons together. 

As it was wont to do, the universe decided it hated him and dropped something quite heavy on his head.

.o.o.o.

Loki barely noticed the universe solidify around him before he realized he’d managed to enter about a couple hundred feet above ground level. His armor and gravity yanked him down before he even had a chance to think up a spell.

His landing space groaned.

Loki pushed himself backwards, realizing he’d landed on a short person wearing a mask. “Who the Hel are-”

“Move!” the boy barked, tackling him as a burst of energy soared over their heads. “Who are you?”

“I asked first!” Loki snapped.

“You fell on me!” the boy retorted. “Why doesn’t that Spider Sense work when I—shit!” He knocked Loki down again, this time behind some barrels that toppled onto them.

“What is going on?” Loki demanded.

“That’s what I just asked you,” the boy growled, shoving one of the metal barrels off himself. “You come out of nowhere and-”

“Who is trying to kill us?” Loki demanded.

“Me, actually, he’s mad at me,” the boy corrected. 

“What did you do?” Loki asked, trying to buy enough time to skip over to a saner realm.

“Stopped him from committing armed robbery. What’d you do to get dropped on me?” the boy asked. Loki noticed the front of his outfit had a stylized spider on it—a clan symbol, perhaps? He was too strong to be a human…

“I prevented a murder,” Loki said. “And a war.”

“Wow, how much are you lying?” the boy chuckled as he glanced over the pile. 

Loki jerked slightly. Did this boy just…just catch him? “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Too stiff in your delivery. It’s like when Doc Ock is convincing himself something’s for the greater good or Hydro Man’s up for parole,” the boy replied. “You see a guy in a quilted yellow costume?”

“…What?” Loki asked. Apparently there was a realm made entirely of the insane.

“Well, since he tried shooting you too, thought it would be nice for you to help,” the boy muttered.

“I do not need to give you assistance merely because you ask,” Loki said, standing up. “I-”

The boy moved to grab him, but the shockwave had already sent him airborne.

“Shocker!” the boy snapped, punting one of the barrels at the opponent. “This is between you and me!”

“Then why’d you bring a buddy, Spider-Man?” the man in the aforementioned quilted costume asked.

“Okay, look, I don’t know who that guy is, so let’s keep it personal, got it quilt-man?” Spider-Man replied. 

“Shocker!” the man snapped, only for something white to come out of the boy’s wrists and tie his hand together.

“Shocking,” Spider-Man replied as the man’s gauntlets connected and he dropped. “So glad I finally figured that—hey, you okay?” He looked at Loki. 

“I’ll be fine,” Loki said stiffly. His arm ached from hitting the wall, so he went to heal it. 

Nothing happened. 

“You sure, I mean I know I heard a crunch when you hit that wall…what are you doing?” Spider-Man asked.

“Nothing that concerns you,” Loki spat, trying to fix the injury again. Some mild sparks came out of his good hand, like when he’d barely begun using magic as a child. This was getting absurd!

“Whoa, you do magic?” Spider-Man asked. “Or, you know, try?”

“What do you know of magic?” Loki asked.

“That what you’re doing looks like what I’ve seen of it,” the boy replied, shrugging as he made more of the white thread—webs, Loki realized belatedly—to tie up Shocker. “Only…less so.”

“Do you know any proper magicians on this world?” Loki asked.

“What, you’re from another planet?” the boy asked teasingly.

“Yes.”

“…Sorry, my bad. Usually a better joke,” Spider-Man said. “And, yeah, I know Dr. Strange, he’s pretty powerful.”

“As am I…when my magic is working properly,” Loki huffed. 

Spider-Man cocked his head, “You, um…want me to take you to him? Maybe he can help.”

Loki frowned as his magic continued to sputter and utterly fail on him. “It would be…appreciated. How do you know you can trust me?”

“I have a built in danger alarm in my head,” Spider-Man said. “You’re not setting it off.”

“Very well. I will meet this doctor of the strange,” Loki said. “Can you first tell me…what world is this?”

“Earth,” Spider-Man said. “Come on, we can go this way. Try to stay hidden though, that armor kind of stands out and screams ‘I’m not from here.’”

Loki followed the odd boy. Earth…Earth…

His mind screeched to a halt. 

Earth was what mortals called Midgard.

.o.o.o.

“You mean he’s not home?” Spider-Man asked. “Come on, Wong, this is the first time I’m really asking for a favor here!”

“I am sorry, Spider-Man,” Wong replied, bowing. “But Dr. Strange is currently in the realm between this and Dormammu’s, strengthening the barrier after the fiend’s latest attempt to cross. I am unsure as to when he’ll return.”

“Well, you work here. Do you know what to do when someone’s magic isn’t working?” Spider-Man asked, gesturing at the guy he’d had to save from Shocker.

“I am afraid not. I primarily tutor any students in combat and literary arts, not mystical ones,” Wong replied. “Though our new friend may stay here until Dr. Strange returns…who are you, friend?”

“Loki,” the man said stiffly. “Loki of Asgard.”

“What, like from the myths and stuff?” Spider-Man asked. Had he just had a trickster god dropped on his head? It explained some things…at least as far as any part of his life ever was explained. 

“Well, Loki of Asgard, you are welcome to a room. Dr. Strange always offers hospitality to visiting magic users, especially if they need sanctuary,” Wong said. “Perhaps your magic is merely adjusting to the new universe and will fix itself, as well.”

“One supposes,” Loki said. 

“Wonderful,” Wong said. “Spider-Man, thank you for your help again. You know Dr. Strange is always happy to be aided in aiding the magical community. And keeping an eye on any magic users who seemingly appear out of thin air.”

“Count me out,” Spider-Man said. “I do science, not magic. Well, hope you get sorted out, Loki!”

.o.o.o.

Wong may or may not have suspected ill of him, but thus far he was treating Loki like a guest, allowing him to roam most of the manor as he pleased. 

Loki had first thought the man’s guess would be right, when he felt a little more of his magic available within a day, but after two it seemed to settle and Loki began to try to see what he was limited to. 

Thus far he had illusions, invisibility, and some minor energy bursts that left him dizzy after using. He’d gotten curious, and was annoyed to find he was capable of freezing a cup of water just perfectly, the wretched blue trying to taint his skin not long after. 

He was also intolerably bored. As Wong and the other people who were around didn’t seem to have a reason to prevent him from leaving, Loki simply made himself invisible and slipped out when he pleased.

This of course made re-locating the rather interesting Spider-Man far easier.


	2. Chapter Two: That’s Stalking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wherein Loki find out a secret ID and makes a second friend.

“Loki! Um, hi!” Spider-Man managed to keep his rather precarious-looking balance on the gargoyle despite the startle. “How’s it going at the Sanctum?”

“This doctor you mentioned has yet to return,” Loki replied. “Though a few of my powers appear to be back, and my physical abilities seem unaffected by the realm-shift.”

“Well, that’s good,” Spider-Man said. “Um…did you need something?”

“Perhaps a good conversation. Wong is harder to find than any mortal has a right to be…and far too cryptic,” Loki huffed.

“Oh, this from the supposed God of Lies?” Spider-Man asked. 

“What?”

“I looked it up in a mythology book,” Spider-Man said. “Shit. Mugging. Be back in a moment.”

Loki watched the young man swing down, knock out two criminals, toss a woman’s bag back to her, and soon resume his place on the gargoyle. “Impressive. You seem to handle mundane criminals better than, ah, Shocker.”

“I handle him fine when I’m not getting snippy gods dropped on my head,” Spider-Man replied. 

“Tell me, why do you hide your face?” Loki asked. “Are you disfigured in some way?” He’d heard passing comments about mutants here and there…

“No. It’s to protect people I care about. If those guys I just stopped knew who I was, they might hurt my friends and family.”

“Ah, so you have family,” Loki said. 

“…Most people do,” Spider-Man said, and Loki got the feeling he was being given an odd look under that mask. “Look, um, anything really important? I’ve got patrolling to do.”

“Feel free,” Loki said. 

Unbeknownst to the Spider, he had an invisible tracker for the majority of his night.

.o.o.o.

“The boy is mad,” Loki told Wong. “I only met up with him at eleven, too, he probably started earlier. How has he not died from exhaustion?”

“People can perform amazing feats when they give themselves a mission to fulfill,” Wong said. 

Loki paused. That was true. To keep a not-ready brother off the throne he’d figured out how to walk between the realms, something no one else could do. He’d killed the King of the Jotun, something he’d never even convinced of doing before…the incident. 

He’d played a greater game than he ever had…and for what? Thor was back in Asgard, likely to become king in some near future, Laufey was dead but there were other Jotun still alive and able to rebuild…and what of himself?

‘God of Lies.’ Maybe the mortals’ incorrect texts were not entirely to be dismissed…

“If you have no other needs, I shall be going. I have my own matters,” Wong said. 

“Thank you for the meal,” Loki said absently. 

He found himself spending most of next week time following Spider-Man. Eventually he learned of the boy, learned of his youth when seeing him unmask after a long night, learned of his friends when following that youth to school, and learned of  
his decidedly undeserved reputation. 

If nothing else, that would be addressed. Loki was insatiable when it came to knowledge, and the need to know why about this boy was driving him half-mad. 

.o.o.o.

“You…do not complain.”

Peter had jumped as soon as he’d heard the disembodied voice, freaking out because his spider-sense hadn’t done a thing and wondering if it was Venom again. He slumped against the wall as Loki became visible. “What are you doing here?!?” This was his house and he was Peter not Spider-Man right now and oh shit, how did this guy know…

The possibly-a-god gave him an affronted look. “I apologize if my presence offends-”

“No, no, just…kind of weird, having a god follow a guy around,” Peter said. “And come on, it’s not like I actually have the ability to get rid of you myself and I guess you could be curious since you pretty much flattened me and then we hung out a bit but-”

“You’re babbling, Spider,” Loki said. “Now, explain this.” He dropped a copy of today’s Bugle on the bed. “And this.” Yesterday’s. “And these.” Most of last week’s. “And do so with less…aimless chatter.”

“Uh, the editor kind of hates my guts. I mean, I know why and it’s kind of crazy but it does make sense in a way, so-”

“Take this,” Loki said, tapping yesterday’s paper. “I saw you stop those thieves and bind them with your webbing, and yet this says you were their ringleader. There is a minor retraction on page two of today’s proclamation, but it is very hard to find.”

“Lots of papers are embarrassed about their retractions,” Peter said. 

“And you provide pictures of yourself to these people…why, exactly? Normally one goes out of one’s way to avoid getting caught doing wrong, not freely give information that might lead to accusations for ill they did not do,” Loki said. “I saw you hand over photos myself!”

“Look, it’s how my boss is, I need the cash, and how about we talk about the fact that you’re clearly stalking me? That how you found out who I was, too?” Peter asked angrily. 

“I have little better to do,” Loki said, “My powers are still weak and you interest me.”

“Great,” Peter huffed. “Look, just…lay off a little, okay? I don’t need to go totally paranoid, and I talked to Wong at the Sanctum Sanctorum like two days ago and he said Dr. Strange will be back soon.”

“He is a well-learned practitioner of magic, you said?” Loki asked.

“He’s this world’s ‘Sorcerer Supreme’ so I’d hazard a yes,” Peter said. “I mean, I’ve only just helped him track some people down now and then and got to help once with this nut job called Baron Mordo, but we get along well enough and he should be able to help.”

“I see. There are other magic users on this world, then?” Loki asked. 

“Well, I don’t know any personally, but yeah,” Peter said. “I mean, “Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man’ isn’t a joke, I’m pretty much NYC only.”

“I do not understand you and other mortals’ need to abbreviate the name of this city,” Loki said, tapping his chin. “Then again, most places in Asgard have one word names, so we couldn’t make many distinct abbreviations anyway…”

“Can you please go muse on how weird we mortals are somewhere else?” Peter asked. “I have schoolwork.”

“No. You have yet to tell me why you put up with the obvious madness that is your life,” Loki said.

“Because someone needs to protect this city,” Peter said. “Seriously, I need to get this done…”

“This city has other protectors,” Loki said shortly. “The…NYPD, I believe, is their title, and those people in that tall building…”

“The Baxter Building? They have more global stuff to deal with…and galactic stuff,” Peter said. “And the police can’t always handle the guys I do.”

“By the way you were swinging back to this home three nights ago, you have trouble handling them too, sometimes.”

“Loki. I need to have this done by tomorrow. Get out of my room and stop stalking me,” Peter said.

“Boy, do you really think you can make a god do anything?”

“I think this is my room and I don’t want you here right now.”

Loki frowned, before smiling slowly in a way that made Peter shiver. “Very well. I’ll see you tomorrow, Spider.”

He was gone.

It was only then Peter had the sense to ask, “What do you mean, tomorrow?”

.o.o.o.

“Poor thing, you’ve been on edge all day, haven’t you?”

Peter twitched. “Hello, L-”

“Lukas,” the man who could only be Loki said with a smile. “Lukas will suffice, Peter.”

“Oh, now you want a secret ID too?” Peter asked quietly.

“I merely want to ‘hang out’ with my dear mortal friend,” Loki said. “And quite frankly I have frequented this palace of books before—I rather like it. Are all Midgard libraries so large?”

“This one is unusually big, it’s part of a university,” Peter said. “Look, I have a science project, so if you wouldn’t mind-”

“Hearing you mutter incoherently about mortal science? I’d love to,” Loki said.

Peter sighed. He had been jumpy all day, wondering when Loki was going to show up. At least the god had left him alone at school. “Fine, Lukas, but this project is important to me.”

“Peace, friend,” Loki said. “I merely wish to learn of your mortal understanding of the world around you.”

“You want to tease me.”

“Well, yes,” Loki said. “But I can save it for later, if you like…assuming you agree to finish our discussion at some point?”

“Our discuss—Loki, that is none of your business,” Peter said.

“It is. You are my guide to this world. If you are mentally unstable I should like to know,” Loki said.

“I think you’re the one we need to worry about there,” Peter said. “Fine, later, after I do my hero-stuff tonight. Okay?”

“Deal,” Loki said. “Do your project as you will.” He pulled a book about presidents out from under his arm. 

“Studying our government?” Peter asked.

“Democracy in general intrigues me. I saw it in Greece, but that was different,” Loki said. “Don’t you have a project, Peter?”

Peter shook his head and got to work. Loki was just too strange sometimes. 

.o.o.o.

“Hey Peter, there you—who’s that?”

Loki looked up. A boy with short, curly red hair faced them. A close acquaintance of Peter’s from what he recalled from his observations. Harry, he believed. 

“Harry!” Peter said, proving him right. “Oh, I was just getting finished. This is…Lukas.”

Loki belatedly realized he had no backstory or surname for his alias. Oh well. “Lukas Gabriel, nice to meet you.” He held out his hand as he’d seen many a mortal do in such situations.

“Harry Osborn,” the boy said, shaking his hand. “Um, how do you know Peter?”

“We met here. I am a researcher, working on a doctorate, and we got to talking. I have some theories about scientific explanations for phenomena found in mythology, you see,” Loki said. “Sadly biology is my weak area, so it was a good thing Peter here was able to help me out.”

“Oh,” Harry said shortly, his expression closing off a good deal. “So, Pete, you want to go get dinner?” His body language clearly indicated that he did not want Loki involved in whatever they were to do.

“Harry, I’ll be done in just a sec—but then I need to go to work, right, darn it…” Peter said, hurriedly returning to his notes.

Harry sat down and shot Loki a calculating look. Loki walked off, returned his book to the shelf, and came back. Harry was still sitting with Peter, and staunchly ignored his return.

Loki frowned, why would this youth be so rude to him? He was merely spending time with Peter-

Ah. Jealousy. It was, sadly, something Loki was all too familiar with. 

“So, anyways, if you’re done here, do you want to get something to eat?” Harry asked. “Come on, there’s a good pizza place down the block—my treat.”

“I don’t know Harry, I have a lot to do—like I said, work,” Peter said. 

Loki smiled. It was time to test if Peter really did have a guilt complex and maybe get Harry on his side. “You know, Peter, in many cultures it is rude to refuse a free meal for any circumstances. And your work is freelance, if I’m not mistaken.”

“Thanks for the input, Lukas,” Peter muttered. 

“I’m only saying that you’ve complained to me a few times about not having enough time for your friend Harry, and that whatever it is you need to do it can probably take care of itself for the span of time in which a meal is eaten,” Loki said. After all, Peter didn’t need to save people all the time, did he?

“You know, Pete, I think I really like this guy,” Harry said, grinning. “Lukas, want to come to dinner with us?”

“Need help dragging Peter?” Loki asked, grabbing the brunette’s arm. 

“Let me go!” Peter snapped.

“I just might,” Harry laughed, seizing the other arm.

.o.o.o.

“Loki, I swear if you ever do anything to Harry, I’ll kill you.”

“Perish the thought, little Spider,” Loki said. “He seems a fine boy, if distracted at times. I have no reason to do anything.”

“Other than stalk me.”

“When I am no longer bored, you shall be informed.”

“Loki, go to hell.”

“Why on earth would you want me to go to Helhiem?”

“Never mind…”


	3. The Mind is a Mischievous Thing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not dead, I swear. The muse for the early chapters just took a long nap.

“The doctor has returned.”

“Cool, does he know what’s up with your magic?” Peter asked, checking his math homework.

“He wishes for a character reference.”

“Oh. Hasn’t Wong been around you enough?”

“Wong refuses to judge people, apparently.”

“…Fine. Just let me do this bio chapter and I’ll go.”

.o.o.o.

Loki found Dr. Strange to be rather intriguing. This was no shock, the man had been described to him before as the chief sorcerous power of this realm and so Loki would have been interested anyway, but the ma had the bearing of someone who was confident in both his powers and himself.

Loki of course hoped he could get his powers back to see who was really more supreme. That would be fun.

Spider-Man finished explaining things to dr. Strange, who nodded before rounding on Loki. “So, has anything like this every happened before?”

“No,” Loki said.

“I see,” Dr. Strange said, his amulet glittering slightly. Loki could tell it wasn’t just a trick of the light. “You have traveled between realms unaided with no trouble before?”

“Yes,” Loki said.

“And was this trip different?”

“…The Bifrost was destroyed. I was hanging off part of the destroyed bit with Thor, but I fell,” Loki said stiffly.

“I have heard of the Bifrost,” Dr. Strange said. “You do not seem to be suffering from being near a recent energy backlash-”

“Not recent. I have been here merely a month,” Loki said.

“Yay. A month of him stalking me,” Spider-Man teased. “Want an anniversary gift?”

“How long were you falling?” Dr. Strange asked.

“Not long—no, wait, it was summer on Earth when my fall began…it is autumn now…” Loki said. “Perhaps it only…felt like hours instead of days?”

“The void between worlds could have sapped his power,” Wong suggested.

“Yes, but then it should have come back,” Dr. Strange mused. He began pacing in a circle around Loki, “I wonder…”

“Wonder what?” Loki asked, cocking his head and narrowing his eyes slightly.

“If perhaps this is not an exterior problem, but an interior one,” Dr. Strange replied. “If instead of being gone it is simple blocked off from him…”

“So…do you know what’s wrong?” Spider-Man asked.

“I have my theories,” Dr. Strange replied, still circling Loki. “I know of the realms he is from and of the magic and powers from them, but the block seems…multi-leveled.”

“Explain,” Loki said warily.

“Magic requires something from the user,” Dr. Strange said. “The magic I use requires focus, Mordo’s requires selfishness, Dormammu draws from his inner depravity…I think that is a part of this.”

“What do you mean?” Loki asked.

“Have you recently endured some form of extreme mental stress?” Dr. Strange asked. “Or perhaps a massive shift of perspective or priorities?”

“What?” Loki breathed.

“I think you mind is troubled, which is heavily contributing to the forces blocking your magic,” Dr. Strange said.

“I disagree,” Loki said firmly.

“I don’t,” Spider-Man said. Loki glared at him. “Well, _I don’t_. You act…really weird around certain topics and questions.”

“I think your emotional state has an effect on your magic, friend,” Dr. Strange said. “Or your mental state, or both. Might I ask what happened?”

“No,” Loki said stiffly.

“I can barely get anything out of him, either,” Spider-Man said.

Dr. Strange nodded, “Well, if you will not talk to others about it, I’d at least recommend looking into some self-help books and psychological literature. See if anything strikes a chord. If you can work through your troubles your magic should return.”

.o.o.o.

“That was only somewhat helpful,” Loki huffed.

“Hey, I still think he’s right.”

“And even if he is, how does that help me?”

“…Well, like he said,” Peter replied. “You need to figure out what’s troubling you.”

“I am not troubled.”

“You’re troubled. You are _so_ troubled,” Peter countered.

“And what, pray tell, makes you think I am troubled?”

“The way you say you’re not troubled. Like you’re trying to insist on it so it becomes true when it’s not,” Peter said. “Something happened to make you fall on me, to fall to earth.”

“And if it did?”

“Does that thing…worry you?”

“No.”

“Does anything that happened before that thing worry you?”

“You’re getting annoyingly nosy, Spider. I’m not sure I appreciate it,” Loki said.

“See? The second I pry, your walls go right up,” Peter said. “Whatever happened before you fell is bothering you, and it’s somehow bothering you so much that that it’s eating at your mind and therefore your magic.”

“I thought you said you did not understand magic.”

“I can listen when Dr. Strange is talking,” Peter argued. “Loki…clearly keeping this all in your head isn’t working. You’re a smart guy, if you could have worked it out alone you’d have done it by now. Would you please let me help you with this?”

“And why should I tell you anything?” Loki asked.

“Because you’ve invaded my life,” Peter said. “You’ve been nice to my best friend, who trust me, needs more people who do that. You worry about me, about how the _Bugle_ affects me ad how hard I work at being a hero. You make sure I sleep. You steal my textbooks. I think that means we’re good enough friends by now for me to worry about _you_ now.”

“We’re…friends, are we?” Loki mused.

“You’ve called me one before, you know.”

“Well, yes, but most of those times I wished to pacify your fears,” Loki said. “Let you know I had no intention of doing harm. Or imitating Wong’s habit of referring to me as such even though clearly I am just a houseguest in that case.”

“You said it yourself. You don’t mean me any harm,” Peter said. He sat on the bed and patted the space next to him. “You’re a person who is around me a lot, who I like being around when your snark’s not too out of control, and we don’t mean each other any harm. So yes, we’re friends, Loki.”

“So…that’s a friend,” Loki mused.

“What, don’t tell me you’ve never had any. A smart guy like you?” Peter asked. “I mean, you’ve got the _best_ wit, man, and-”

“I am of Asgard. Wit is secondary to might,” Loki said.

“Well…you seem pretty powerful to me. Especially if what I’ve seen isn’t you at full power,” Peter said.

“My brother had friends. I do not think they were my friends, though.”

“You have a brother?”

“Had.”

“Oh, man, I’m so sorry. When my uncle died-”

“He lives.”

“Then why the past tense?” Peter asked.

“you want me deep, dark secret, Peter Parker?” Loki asked. “Then I shall ask you this: when did your aunt and uncle take you in?”

“I was a baby,” Peter said. “Wasn’t even old enough to talk.”

“So young? And yet you do not call them mother and father?” Loki asked.

“They knew I was a smart kid, that I’d know Aunt May was probably too old to have had me when I was born,” Peter said. “But they’re practically my parents anyway, despite the titles. I’ve never even seen a picture of my real parents, well, a picture of them as adults, Aunt May has one of them at prom. I could walk past them on the street and not know.”

“And this does not matter to you?”

“Not really. Uncle Ben was for all intents and purposes my dad. He raised me, he loved me, he taught me even when I was too stubborn to learn,” Peter said quietly. “So what was different for you?”

“I never knew,” Loki said. “They never told me. I grew up merely thinking Thor was father’s favorite but then I realized that he was more loved because he was the true son.”

“So your brother…Thor…your dad favored him?” Peter asked. “I mean, I don’t have siblings but…well, you know Harry?”

“Yes. We’ve met. You’ve threatened me if I ever harm him.”

“Yeah, Harry,” Peter said. “His dad…kind of favors _me_.”

“What?” Loki asked.

“I don’t ask for it or invite it, it kind of upsets me, really, seeing what it does to Harry, but he does. Some adults just do it. They don’t even seem to know it’s a bad thing,” Peter said. “What about your mom?”

“She’s not really my-”

“What about the woman you called mom all your life?”

“I called her mother, actually,” Loki said. “And she…she taught me magic. Aided me in advancing my academic studies beyond even that which a prince usually knows. Spoke to me of great things beyond the stars.”

“Sounds like she loved you.”

“She still lied to me.”

“Loki…I won’t pretend to know your situation,” Peter said. “But maybe they didn’t want you to feel different or left out-”

“They failed. Once I knew…there was no going back,” Loki said.

“…You never mentioned your brother,” Peter said.

“What about him?”

“Do you think he loved you?”

“I…I don’t know, perhaps?” Loki said. “I loved him. Greatly. Almost worshipped him until it became clearer and clearer that I would always be in his shadow and nothing more.”

“So you were jealous. Did he know?”

Loki went very still. “I…do not…he _should_ have.”

“Did you ever tell him?”

“Of course not,” Loki scoffed.

“Well, unless your brother can read minds, he might not have known, then,” peter said. “You’re not the easiest guy to read, Loki. I think I’m only managing because I’m a genius and you’re so conflicted you’re letting a lot of tells show you normally wouldn’t.”

“…What should I do, then? I guard my secrets jealously, Spider. I do not like having told you all that I have already.”

“Well, we mortals have this thing called psychology,” Peter said. “It’s the study of why the mind works the way it does. Maybe…maybe you could look at that? I’m sure there’s studies on adopted kids that have been done, too, you could try that.”

“I see,” Loki said.

“Loki…did you run away?”

“What?” Loki asked.

“Did you run away from home?” Peter asked. “Come here to get away?”

Of course he hadn’t, Thor let him fall…

_No._

_No, Thor had held onto that staff like his own life depended on it._

_But Odin had spoken. And Loki had lost his will to hang on as his brother did._

_So he let go and welcomed whatever the abyss held._

“I think I tried to die,” Loki said softly.

“Well don’t ever do that again,” Peter said firmly. “You…you can’t. I’d be…I’d be really really upset if you did, Loki. Sow would your family-”

“They are not my family!” Loki yelled.

“Peter? What’s going on up there?”

Loki looked to Peter.

“Turn into Lukas,” his friend said. “You’re meeting my aunt. She can help.”

“If I’m Lukas, I’m lying, how can she-”

“Come up, Aunt May, you need to meet someone!” Peter called.

Loki changed his shape and sank into he desk chair as he heard someone hurrying up the stairs. The door opened and Loki was face to face with Peter’s aunt.

“Aunt May, this is Lukas. He’s a friend of mine and Harry’s from the library. He’s been having a rough week and, well…can you maybe help?”

“what do you mean, Peter?” she asked.

Loki tried not to squirm, the woman might have been middle aged but she had the eyes of a falcon and was scanning him intently. “I…I’ve had a rough week and have been…what was the word you used, Peter?”

“Internalizing,” Peter said. “Right before he came over from Norway, he’s here to study, he found out he was adopted. Turns out it’s a bigger deal than he was making of it and well…he kind of broke down when we went for coffee, so I brought him home.”

“Oh, it’s Harry and the standardized test all over again,” May muttered. “Come, Lukas, let’s go downstairs and have some tea. We should talk about this in a room that’s _clean_.”

Peter had the decency to look ashamed of himself.

.o.o.o.

“Well, despite your protestations to the contrary, I do think your adoptive family cared for you, Lukas,” May said. “You seem a sweet, intelligent young man, so I don’t see how they couldn’t.”

“I can.”

“Maybe you should see a doctor,” May suggested. “More tea, Peter?”

“I’m good. I told him that too, Aunt May,” Peter said.

“I spoke with one. Nothing he said really helped. All platitudes if you ask me,” Lukas muttered.

May looked at the boys. Lukas looked like a turtle with how he was trying to vanish into his coat, and Peter, well, she only ever saw him this worried when Harry had a family crisis.

What was it with her nephew and picking up friends with family troubles?

“Well, you seem bright, as I said. Maybe there’s some books at that library you boys hang around in?” May asked. “Something that might help you? Goodness knows the self-help section gets larger all the time…”

“They write books to make people help themselves?” Lukas asked blankly, his head jerking up so quickly that some of his curls fell into his face.

“Is that not as much a thing in Norway?” Peter asked.

“Ah, no. Not so much. But then I guess I tended to stay in the academic sections of bookstores anyway. Does it maybe have to do with the stereotype that Americans are self-obsessed?” Lukas asked.

May laughed, “It probably does.”

Lukas smiled slightly. “Well, glad I can still joke, at least.”

“Stay for dinner, dear. I grill all Peter’s new friends.”

Lukas gave Peter a wry grin, “No wonder you only know Harry, if she cooks your acquaintances.”

“You know darn well she means question you,” Peter sighed.

May smiled and headed for the kitchen. Still, better an exchange student with family issues than some lunatic or drug user or other bad influence. And really, Lukas seemed a nice boy.

He’d probably be good for Peter and Harry.


	4. Of Human Bonding

Heeding the tellings of Peter, the doctor and the clearly-wise Aunt May, Loki began looking to the mortal literature that had to do with the mind.

“Sheesh, Lukas, how much stuff do you study?” Harry asked.

“Whatever interests me,” Loki replied absently.

“Harry, don’t even bother. Lately he goes right into la-la land when he’s got a psych book,” Peter said.

“All right, _who_ named a period of intensive focus on one thing to the exclusion of others ‘la-la land’?” Loki demanded.

“No clue,” Peter said as he and Harry went back to their homework.

The library had slowly become a haven for the two boys as much as it had Loki. The quiet atmosphere helped Peter do his homework as quickly as possible and Harry to do his homework _period_. The boy seemed to have a studying problem—he wanted to do it in that he knew he had to, but it was hard for him. It was like Thor with book-learning but with more effort expended.

No. No thinking of Thor until he figured out what he really felt about that whole mess.

“Hey, um, guys?” Harry asked as he finally finished his mathematics work. “Look, um, my dad’s out of town until tomorrow, and I was wondering—want to have a movie night? I mean, Pete, we haven’t done that in ages and Lukas, I never see you outside this place or that coffee shop unless Pete calls you to meet us after school…”

Loki was aware of mortal “movies” but he did not understand the dedication of a night to them. He shot Peter a quick glance.

The brunette smiled, “I think it’ll do us some good. I’ve been working too hard according to someone-”

“He fell asleep on his books yesterday,” Loki said pleasantly.

“-yeah,” Peter said. “Anyway, I’m in. Lukas?”

Loki shrugged, “Sure. Why not?” His studies in psychology had netted him little—perhaps relaxing his mind would be of assistance…

.o.o.o.

“But why do they not kill him when they have the chance?” Loki demanded.

“Lukas, you never manage to take out the monster in a slasher film, it just doesn’t happen,” Harry laughed.

“But surely it would not be too difficult!” Loki protested. “I mean, just be certain—destroy the head or some other vital area and _then_ be on your merry way! And _why_ is that woman trying to fight in such a low cut top? Sif would have her head…”

“Who?” Harry asked.

Loki kicked himself for the slip, “Norse warrior goddess. I’ve always liked this one poem that featured her, is all. Feminists would love her.” Besides, Sif _would_ be appalled…

“I think we can officially say normal horror movies and Lukas don’t mix,” Peter snickered, taking some popcorn.

“See! See! You _should_ have killed him!” Loki lectured the characters. “ _Damn_ , that’s bloody. Too bloody. No one person contains that much blood!”

“Torture porn sells,” Harry said dismissively. “Okay, so, if we don’t want him yelling at the screen, what would you pick, Pete?”

“Let me see,” Peter said, leaning over to Harry’s DVD cabinet. “Okay…oh, how about Sherlock Holmes? You like smart people, and this stars one!”

“Doing very kickass things,” Harry added as Peter put in the disc.

“I have read some of the stories about him…” Loki mused. “ _Hound of Baskervilles_ was good…”

“Well, this does have the whole ‘is it a hoax or not?’ thing going on,” Harry said as the opening credits began rolling.

“Lovely,” Loki said, relaxing a bit.

The film was clearly more to his taste—no one was being abjectly stupid, indeed there was the total opposite going on here. He liked it better.

Soon the film was over and Peter was digging for a new one—Harry was insisting on something called “Battle Los Angeles” and Peter was protesting while Loki assumed it was a battle _in_ the city, since fighting a city _itself_ made no sense.

“Having fun boys? _Harry_ …who’s your new friend?”

Harry went rigid, “Um, Dad! You weren’t supposed to be back until tomorrow…”

“Early flight,” Harry’s father replied. Loki worked not to frown—something was off, he just wasn’t sure what.

“Oh. Um, dad, this is Lukas Gabriel—that’s not his real last name but I am so not trying to pronounce the real one, it’s Norwegian—he’s a graduate student Pete met at the east library. We were introduced um….what, a month ago?” Harry asked.

“Yes,” Loki said. “A pleasure to meet you, Mr. Osborn.”

Harry’s father sighed, “Harry, I really don’t like you bringing guests in that I don’t know. Especially older ones. I mean—Lukas, you’re what, twenty-five?”

“Two. Twenty-two,” Loki said. “I assure you, Mr. Osborn; we had no…shenanigans of any sort intended. Harry was merely worried over Peter’s and my health. He felt we’d been overworking ourselves.”

“Shenanigans? Sometimes I forget English is your second language,” Harry chuckled.

“Third. Norwegian, then Danish, then English,” Loki said, keeping with his established backstory.

“Ah. From Norway, then?” Harry’s father asked.

“Yes, but I was adopted from Denmark,” Loki said. “Dad wasn’t so happy when I figured it out.”

Peter smiled. Clearly he felt Loki being able to be flippant about his adoption when lying in a fake backstory was a good thing. Odd boy.

“So, come to America to study?” Harry’s father asked as Loki watched Peter and Harry check the floor for kernels and straighten the pillows they’d been lounging on.

“Live, hopefully,” Loki said. “We’ll see how it goes. Student visa for now.”

“You should look into an internship like Pete is,” Harry said. “I’m interning with my dad’s head VP over the summer already…”

“I am looking, there’s just so many to choose from,” Loki lied smoothly. “Besides, it’s not even December yet.”

“To be fair, with all the coursework you seem to be doing, would you even have the time?” Harry asked. “I mean, we were over at Pete’s house last week and Aunt May seemed to think you never slept.”

“I sleep,” Loki muttered. He did. Sometimes. Usually when Wong was nice enough to put dreamless sleep potions in his evening drinks.

“Anyway, we’ll go to my room dad, so we won’t keep you up,” Harry said.

“Help Harry study when you’re in there, boys,” Norman said. “Heaven knows he could use it.”

“Harry studies very hard when we are at the library,” Loki said coolly. “Harder than I do, often.”

“Forgive me for not believing that, Lukas, but it’s nice to see loyalty between friends,” Norman said, giving him a dry look. “Don’t stay up too late, boys.”

Loki had to work very, very hard not to chuck a hex at Norman’s back as the man left them. He did not care so much that it would blow his cover, but it would likely put Harry out and the boy was clearly already upset from his father’s barb. “Does he speak like that of you…often?”

“What? Well, you know parents. Just trying to motivate me, is all,” Harry said. “He thinks he’s helping. Really.”

Loki nodded curtly as he, Harry, and Peter relocated to Harry’s poster-covered bedroom.

Even at his worst Odin had never…not like that. Not in front of others like that.

 _He’d scolded Thor in front of Loki like that, though_.

What did it mean? Well, other than that Harry clearly had worse parenting troubles than Loki did? By the Nine, Loki felt bad about how he’d whined to Peter and May when they’d obviously seen worse…

Was that why they didn’t mind, though?

“Earth to Lukas Gabriel!” Harry said, snapping his fingers. “Come on, man, we’re going to play some board games and I am going to whip you both at them _all_.”

“Oh you are, are you?” Peter asked. “That sounded like a challenge!”

“A challenge it was!” Harry declared proudly. “Pic your poison, Clue or Monopoly?”

“What?” Loki asked.

“Right, not from around here,” Harry said. “Okay, let me explain both and then you’ll pick, Lukas. See, in Clue…”

As Harry continued his explanations, Loki felt himself relax. This was friendship. He was sure of it.

.o.o.o.

“Lukas!” May said as she opened the door. “Peter’s at school right now-”

“I know, Mrs. Parker, I just…I was wondering if I might talk to you,” he said, running a hand through his hair.

“Of course, dear, come in. Is something wrong?”

“I wanted to apologize for my melodramatics the last time I was here,” Lukas said. “I know you were only trying to help and I’m sure I came off as very self-pitying.”

“Well, a little, Lukas, but you’re young. Even at twenty-two the emotional part of the brain is still more in control than the logical part, even for brilliant boys like you and Peter,” May said. “Tea?”

“No thank you, I just had coffee,” Lukas said. “I…I don’t mean to pry but…you know Harry Osborn invited me to that movie night sleepover last Friday, right?”

“Yes. Peter is always in such good moods after getting to really ‘geek out’ with Harry. I’m glad you got to go with them,” May said.

“I…ah…Harry’s father came home,” Loki said.

“Oh,” May said. She’d been used to Norman for years. For someone who’d never seen it before, who’d met Harry first and likely never even heard of Oscorp… “And let me guess, he pressured Harry’s academics.”

“Without necessity!” Lukas said. “Harry studies quite hard at the library, and when I informed Mr. Osborn of that fact-”

“He brushed it off. Lukas, dear, Norman Osborn ascribes to a certain parenting model,” May said gently. “I don’t like it, and I can tell you don’t like it, but he is Harry’s parent. And he does love Harry. Norman is very…very dog-eat-dog about the world. Do you know that colloquialism, dear?”

“Ah…is it the one that if you’re not strong enough you’re weak, essentially?” Lukas asked.

“Close enough,” May said. “He thinks by trying to hold Harry to Peter’s standard of grades Harry will improve, that competition is good for him.”

“But Peter is smarter than Harry. I mean no offense to Harry by that, he has more social skills than Peter and I put together, but Peter could take on two part time jobs and still ace most of his tests,” Lukas said. “I just…what can I do?”

“Do?” May asked, surprised. He’d only known Harry for a month, last she’d checked. Peter for just over two.

“I can’t stand it,” Lukas said. “Harry…it’s worse than my situation ever was. What do I do?”

“Oh Lukas,” May sighed. “There’s nothing you can do but be a good friend for Harry. Let him know that you think he’s great, that he’s capable. Let him know he has you like he has Peter and me.”

“It’s not enough,” Lukas muttered, shoulders slumping. “I…my brother would do more. I know it.”

“Well then your brother must be a nosy person, because trust me, Harry would not appreciate the meddling,” May said. “Just be there when he needs you, dear. That’s what friends do.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Parker,” Lukas said. “I just…my social skills are not the best, as I said, and I did not want to do anything rash.”

“Well, your manners are good, even if your ability to figure out complex social situations might be a little hazy.” May said. “I’m glad I could help, Lukas. And call me Aunt May. Harry does too.”

“Thank you. Aunt May,” Lukas said, smiling.


	5. It's a Damn Cold Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter nearly gets frostbite and finds out a little more about Loki. But Loki' not happy about this part getting found...

“So, any progress?” Peter asked.

Loki hummed quietly, “How long has it been again?”

“Since you landed on me? Little over three months,” Peter said. “Don’t move the notes in that book.”

“What, the neon things?” Loki asked.

“Yeah, I have a midterm on them at the end of the week,” Peter said. “So, how are your powers doing?”

“All right. You and Harry have been quite a help. So has Aunt May, she’s a wonderful person to talk to,” Loki said. “It’s not to where I’d be comfortable using my magic in combat, but at least I can _feel_ it all again. It’s there, it’s just not doing much.”

“Well, that’s good,” Peter said. “Maybe you’ll be able to go home…Loki?” He frowned at the look on the god’s face. “What’s wrong?”

Loki apparently realized he was expressing whatever he was feeling and his face went blank, “Nothing to trouble yourself with, Spider.”

“Loki, I thought you were going to tell me when you started getting like that,” Peter scolded.

“And I thought I told you some things were for me alone!”

“Loki…we’ve been talking. I know at the very least you said you tried to die with what you did and that you love your adoptive mother,” Peter said. “Shouldn’t you at least let her know you’re okay?”

“I don’t know if I can,” Loki said finally. “And that’s all I’ll say on the matter.”

“Okay, then you do me a favor,” Peter said. “Patrol is calling my name. See these notes? Type them up and email them to Harry—I showed you how that works, right?”

“Yes, when I asked of your correspondence upon the computer many weeks ago,” Loki said. “I shall do my task, oh great hero. Don’t get yourself killed out there.”

“Loki, I never come back worse than broken ribs,” Peter laughed.

.o.o.o.

While Loki was displeased at his typing speed—he’d seen both Harry and Peter’s fingers fly over the keys while he was merely poking at them—he eventually managed to get the document done and sent.

Then there was a return message. “Hey Pete, you up late too?”

Loki was disinclined to lie to Harry. “This is Lukas. Peter had me type it up. Math problems giving him problems for once.”

“Oh, thanks Lukas,” came back a minute later. “Glad to know I’m not the only one. Do you have a cell phone?”

“Cheap one. Here’s my number”

He’d gotten it from a convenience mart. Paid by minutes spoken. He only spoke to three people, so it was no trouble. Might become one if Wong ever got a phone, though, Loki might be pushed prank call him a lot…

The phone rang, “Lukas speaking.”

“Hey man. So Pete’s in the zone, huh?”

“Very.”

“Is it cold out tonight or what?”

“Huh?” Loki asked.

“Do you, like, not watch the weather? It’s been coming for like two days!” Harry laughed. “Look out Pete’s window!”

Loki’s eyes widened at the snow drifting down. “Will this affect your school transport? Is that why your mood is so good?”

“Yep. No busses means no school, even if you don’t take one to get there,” Harry said smugly. “So tell Pete he can lay off the books for now!”

“One moment,” Loki covered the receiver, waited how long it would take to say and get a reply, and then uncovered it, “Not until he figures out that one problem. Spoilsport.”

“Ah, well. My dad owns cars with snow tires—workaholic, you know? How about I come over tomorrow?”

“If Peter’s not in a study coma, sure,” Lukas said. “Harry, I think I’m going to go. You mind?”

“Nah, it’s cool. Bet you saw snow like this all the time in Norway, though, huh?”

“Yes. Sadly uninteresting,” Loki said. “Bye.”

“Later.”

Loki pocketed his phone. Hm. This would make explaining how he could safely return to his lodging tricky to Aunt May…

“Lukas!”

He went rigid. “Yes ma’am?”

“I’m making up a bed for you. No arguments, young man!”

Amazing. The woman could read minds. He should introduce her to mother-

Oh. Wait. No. Not his mother. And not an option. “My thanks, Aunt May! You are a woman of unparalleled kindness!”

“All right! When you’re done making sure Peter doesn’t fall asleep at his desk, your bed will be ready!”

“Thank you very much!” Loki called. “Good night.”

“Good night, Lukas. Good night Peter!”

Loki cast a voice mimicry spell, “Night Aunt May! Hey, Lukas, don’t mess with that!”

Loki smiled as he straightened the room. At least it was nice and warm in here. Snow held…awkward memories.

He flipped through some of Peter’s books before looking over at the clock.

His eyes widened. Was it really that late? Did he truly type so slowly?

Oh no. Peter should have been back by now.

Loki shook his head. The boy knew how to take care of himself. He remained mostly unharmed despite his battles even as he swung around the city was a suit thinner than most of Loki’s…shirts…

Loki dug Peter’s spare costume out of the closet. By the Nine it was thin. There was no way such a thing could protect against cold, especially for a mortal!

Clearly Peter hadn’t been watching the weather either. He should find out what that phrase meant, really. No matter, he had to find Peter.

.o.o.o.

Spider-Man rubbed his arms. Even the adrenaline and activity of stopping two muggings and rescuing car crash victims wasn’t keeping him warm in this weather. But the wind was worse higher up, so if he tried webslinging…well, he’d be a Spidey-cicle.

And then Aunt May would panic and Harry would panic and Loki would probably panic _and_ laugh at him…

“Stupid snow,” he muttered, hopping to yet another low roof. “Stupid storm. Stupid spider, not seeing this coming.”

“Do you often talk to yourself? Because maybe I’m not the only one who needs those self-help books.”

“Loki…hey,” Spider-Man said.

“You’re not shivering,” Loki observed. “From your textbooks on biology and temperatures, I am given to believe that is bad.”

“Yeah, it is. Kind of sleepy, too. So, yeah, bad,” Spider-Man admitted.

“Well I can’t teleport you straight home, the temperature change might shock you too badly,” Loki mused.

“Well, you’re just in your normal coat. Heck, you don’t even have gloves like me! Did you just rush out?”

“I am fine. Cold does not affect me,” Loki said. “Spider, let me try something. I’m going to draw out some of the cold that is harming you.”

Loki carefully eased one of Peter’s gloves down while pushing the sleeve up, exposing his cold, cold forearm to the bitter air. Peter grit his teeth against the wind’s bite.

“Um, Loki, you know cold’s more an absence of heat, right? You don’t so much remove cold as add heat,” Spider-Man said, swaying on his feet a bit.

“Shut up. I’m magic, remember?” Loki said sharply. “Now then…let me see…”

Peter watched as Loki put his bare hands on the skin. Peter didn’t like the color his arm was right now. He hoped the numbness in his fingers wasn’t frostbite. That’d be bad. And hard to explain.

Suddenly he felt…warmer. Somehow. “How are you doing that?”

“I am winter,” Loki breathed slowly. “I am ice. It is mine. I can pull it out.”

His voice sounded almost like a mantra, or maybe an incantation. But there was a hint of something else in it, something unhappy that had Peter worried.

“Okay man, whatever works,” Peter said. “I’m starting to feel better now, I think I can make it home…Loki!”

“What?” the god said, his head snapping up.

“You’re blue!” Oh my god, did Loki hurt himself over this? “Don’t give yourself frostbite over me!” Wait, no frostbite wasn’t _bright_ blue…what was blue…?

“It’s a…thing. I do. Around cold,” Loki said. “I don’t like it. But you needed help now. Foolish boy.”

“Oh. Sorry,” Peter said. “Are you sure you’re not going to be sick or something?”

“Physically, no, mentally…I do not like the reminder,” Loki said, staring at his hands. “We must get back to your home before your aunt becomes suspicious that neither of us is in bed.”

Peter blinked and they were in his room.

“Put on warmer clothes,” Loki commanded. “And thick socks on both your feet and hands. This instant.”

“Yes sir,” Peter sighed, going to his dresser. “So is this…blue thing…part of…”

“Why I am as I am? Yes,” Loki said. “And we shall speak no more of it. I do _not_ like to be reminded of it.”

“Okay, Loki. Chill out—erm…poor choice of words,” Peter said. “And get out. I’m stripping and you are not allowed in for that.”

“Good night, Peter.”

“Night, Loki.”

.o.o.o.

The next morning was ice and cold outside, but Loki was pleased to see the house’s heating system had aided him in restoring his skin to its proper coloration.

To hear Peter exclaim so loudly upon seeing his changed appearance…Loki had been frightened. Frightened his friend would know he had befriended a monster.

But no. Peter did not know of the Jotun, any more than he knew of Asgard or the other realms. He had merely been concerned for Loki’s own welfare, that the mage had hurt himself in healing Peter. And once he’d been assured Loki was fine…well, physically fine…he had not…not minded.

There had been no real revulsion, or even serious confusion once Loki had confirmed it was normal enough. Peter had seemed more miffed that Loki would not explain why he was so bothered by his own appearance.

Peter did not understand. He could not understand. This was not like a family situation that could be approximated to one mortals might have. This was being something you never knew you were, something you had always feared and it was you all along and-

“Lukas! You want pancakes?”

“Down in a moment, Peter. Thank your aunt for me!” Loki called downstairs.

He must have slept in. Stress was throwing off his sense of time.

He reached for his magic. What had been there was still there but it felt…taxed somehow. Tired. As his mind was.

Damn Dr. Strange for being right.

Loki turned back to Lukas and carefully combed through his now-curlier hair to give his hands something to do.

How could he manage this? His knowledge of what he was, it was interfering with his magic. But he could not simply _forget_ it. Even if he knew such a spell there would be far too many chances for him to recall the horrid fact in the future. Oh, and he’d have to wipe Peter’s mind. And Odin, Frigga, and Hiemdall would still know.

Did _Thor_ know, actually?

Did it matter?

“Lukas, come on!”

“Right, right!” he called, jogging down the stairs. “Sorry.”

Peter gave him a worried look when he entered the kitchen, but the boy wiped it from his face by the time his aunt turned around.

“I can’t believe we got such a storm! And so soon!” Aunt May exclaimed as she set down a platter full of pancakes.

“Right on both counts,” Peter said.

“Harry scolded me for being surprised. Said the weathermen had predicted it,” Loki said.

“Oh, you talked to Harry?” Peter asked.

“Yes. You were ‘in the zone’ with your studies,” Loki said.

“Oh. He’s going to want to come over, isn’t he?”

Loki nodded, “He said his father owned snow tires.”

“Well, then I’d better get more hot chocolate on. Harry’s practically addicted,” Aunt May said, heading for the panty.

“Hot chocolate?” Loki asked.

“You’ll love it,” Peter said. As Aunt May leaned further into the panty to look for the chocolate he asked quietly, “Do you want to talk about it before Harry gets here?”

“What?” Oh, the blue thing. “No! Why do you always want to… _talk_ about things?” Loki demanded.

“Because talking about problems is good for you.” Oh, Aunt May was back. “Now, what was this problem you were having?”

“…I got a text from my… _brother_ ,” Loki said. “And deleted it before reading it.”

“He feels guilty but also doesn’t want to talk to him,” Peter added, catching on. “And confused as to how his brother got his number.”

“From what I’ve heard your brother is very nosy,” May pointed out.

“That is probably it, yes,” Loki liked smoothly. “I’ll think about doing something about t.”

There was a loud knock followed by Harry yelling, “Am I too late for pancakes?”

He shot Peter a look behind May’s back as she went to get the door. He was not talking about the Jotun issue with Peter. Not now, not ever.

Peter rolled his eyes at him before going to greet Harry. Loki sighed, finished his breakfast, and left to do the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, the plot's about to get started now! Took me forever to finish this, was stuck around the breakfast scene wondering what to do. But next time, Peter gets a visitor who's going to drag him (and Loki) into the superheroics of the world at large...  
> Peter? Phil Coulson has a mission for you.


	6. The Mission

 “So…you can also fix stuff. For nothing,” Spider-Man said as Loki repaired his wrist.

 “Not for nothing, I am expending magical energy.”

 “Okay,” Spider-Man said. “You can break the laws of physics and biology whenever you want and the only cost is that some of your energy goes down?”

 “A simple way of putting it but yes,” Loki said.

 “So magic can do anything?”

 “More complicated things have higher costs associated then just expending energy but, yes, I suppose,” Loki said.

 “So it’s not ‘can magic do this?’ it’s ‘can the mage I know do this and are they willing?’” Spider-Man asked.

 “Effectively,” Loki said. “I’m no great shakes with defensive magic, for example, but destruction and discord I can wreak for little to no trouble while it might give someone else issue.”

 “Huh. Rules seem kind of arbitrary,” Spider-Man said, flexing his hand. “Yep, good as new. Thanks.”

 “Try not to fall off any roofs in the future.”

 “Sorry, I freak out a bit when cops pull weapons on me,” Spider-Man said.

 Loki cocked his head, “Wait, this wasn’t incurred against a supervillain?”

 “Loki, I don’t fight a lot of those. Mostly normal criminals. And a few trigger happy boys in blue, but that’s more gum-up-gun-and-run,” Spider-Man said.

 “You are a foolish young man, Spider.”

 “Gee, thanks.”

 “You’re welcome,” Loki replied, smirking after the young man as he swung off. While he certainly wasn’t going to go rushing all over this city in pursuit of heroics like his friend, he didn’t mind helping him out now and then. If anyone in the Nine Realms needed a leg up now and then it was Peter.

 He returned himself to street level and shifted back into his Lukas disguise. It was not quite evening yet, he could potentially seek out Harry since Peter was busy…no, wait, it was a Friday, Norman Osborn was in the bad habit of claiming Friday afternoons as the time Harry got to learn “how to run Oscorp” or something. Harry was never much enthused about it, claimed he didn’t do much but hang around his father’s office.

 His phone buzzed—oh, a text from Harry, he must be getting one of such complaints now.

  _Dad ditched me. You free?_

 Loki texted back that he was and they agreed to meet at the library where he would attempt to help Harry with some essay or something. He also feigned ignorance as to Peter’s whereabouts, claiming the boy must be working for the infernal _Bugle_ on something or other.

 “Cannot believe he just bailed like that,” Harry muttered within seconds of sitting down. “Dude claims my Fridays for the rest of eternity-” oh teenage exaggeration, it was a joy, “-and then just tells me all the sudden that ‘oh, by the way, had something planned for this afternoon, you can go.’ Jerk!”

 “Unless the essay is about how inconsiderate parents affect teenage lives, this may not be the best course of discussion,” Loki suggested. He could go on about the topic for almost as long as Harry could, after all, and he was given to understand this essay was for a grade.

 “Ugh, no, it’s a persuasive essay. I just want to make sure I’m arguing it well and you seem to be good at convincing people to do things,” Harry said, passing the papers over.

 Huh, something about the structure of the school year in this nation. And Harry had taken the less-popular but still-logical tactic that, in non-farming communities at least, summer vacation made no sense and year round quarters with sufficient breaks in-between were better… “I like what I’m seeing but it would be even better if you preemptively countered the main arguments that will be levied against you.”

 “Such as?” Harry asked, folding his arms and looking pensive.

 “Well, I do so love playing Devils’ Advocate…” Loki grinned.

.o.o.o.

 Peter was just making some rounds in a warehouse district when his Spider Sense went wild. He threw himself away from the danger and a loud explosion nearly shattered his eardrums.

 Oh shit. The Green Goblin.

 …And he wasn’t paying any attention to Spider-Man at all, what the heck? “Hey, ugly! Lose your sense of direction in that blast?”

 “You?” the goblin demanded. “What are _you_ doing here?”

 “Yeah, why would the city’s favorite hero be _in the city_?” Spidey brushed off. “Last I checked, NYC was pretty jumpy about _massive in-city explosions_ , buddy!”

 The glider looked different—ah-ha! There was a box strapped to the middle, weird. Greenie was flying funny because of it too; he had to place his feet differently.

 Spider-Man looked around. There was no reason for the guy to just rob random warehouses, was there? What was he after?

 Spider-Man was forced into evasive action as the goblin started throwing bombs again. “Jeez, mean and green! What’s got your armor in a twist? Ooh, are you playing errand boy to someone more powerful again? Kingpin maybe?”

 “Oh, if you only knew!” the Green Goblin laughed, swerving to try and ram Spidey with the glider.

 Spidey swung out of the way, clinging to a lightning rod. “What, that strike a nerve, pal?”

 And, sirens. Maybe he’d be lucky and they’d realize he was trying to stop the supervillain, not work with him. Well, better safe than sorry, “Officers, this man is stealing… _something_!”

 Okay, maybe he should know what the theft is of before he tries yelling exposition.

 The fight was rather interesting, and not just because the cops were clearly trying to coordinate with him, but because the Goblin was both hampered and made desperate by his package. Finally he got fed up and threw a bomb dead at the officers and their car.

 Spider-Man quickly spun and webbed it, using the line to snap it high into the air before it exploded into a mess of smoke and fire.

 “Where’d he go?” Spidey coughed.

 “We lost him!” one of the cops said. “Thanks for the save, Spider-Man.”

 “Thanks for not trying to shoot me like the last guys I ran into,” Spidey replied. “What’s around here? What could he have taken?”

 “I’m afraid, Spider-Man, that is SHIELD business.”

 Spidey turned to the man in the suit, “Um…okay? You are?”

 “Agent Phil Coulson,” Coulson said. “And I’d like to ask you about helping us get our energy invention back.”

 “An energy invention?” Spider-Man asked as the cops started noting down a statement from a man who introduced himself as Stillwell.

 “Well…more of an artifact that can create limitless energy. We have hopes for it,” Coulson said. “Though I’m sure a smart spider like yourself can think of ways that could be used for more…destructive ends, in the wrong hands.”

 “Oh yeah. That’s not really hard,” Spider-Man agreed. “Urgh, someone like Goblin getting it…”

 “Do you have any idea what he might want with it?” Coulson asked.

 “I guess he’s got a bit of a mad scientist thing now and then but really the guy’s all havoc and mayhem,” Spider-Man admitted. “I’d assume some really big bomb, honestly. Maybe a death ray. But probably a bomb.”

  “…Well,” Coulson said, giving the slightest hint of a cringe. “That’s not very good.”

 “Yeah.”

 “Can you think of who he might target?” Coulson asked.

 “He goes after some of the big companies sometimes. The ones with the nice big buildings,” Spider-Man said. “Stark, Fisk, the _Times_ , that kind of thing. Really he’s pretty random.”

 “Lovely. Do you think you can catch up to him?” Coulson asked.

 “Yeah I got a tracer on him,” Spider-Man said.

 “Good work. More heroes could stand to do that,” Coulson said. He held out a flip phone. “Press the call button when you find him. It only calls me.”

 This day had gotten so Men in Black. “Um…okay then.”

.o.o.o.

 “Okay, we’ve got to stop. I’m going go insane if we don’t take a break,” Harry sighed.

 “Well I think we’re at the ‘nitpicks only’ stage if that helps,” Loki said, looking up from skimming Harry’s science textbook. The genetics section had been no help whatsoever in explaining his appearance as being typically Asgardian over Jotun. His runt status could be explained by random gene mutation or recessive inheritance but what on earth about him could cause his natural defaulting to white skin and green eyes? Why was the disguise more prevalent that the truth? Not that he was complaining, he hated the truth, but still...

 “It does, actually,” Harry admitted. “Probably means we’re in solid “A” territory. Thanks, Lukas. I’d offer help with your stuff but it’s probably out of my league…”

 “Don’t sell yourself so short, Harry,” Loki said. “You’re not stupid by a long shot and probably handle hitting a wall when studying better than I do.”

 He certainly wasn’t dealing well with the current wall regarding his magic…

 “Thanks, man,” Harry said. “Hey, let’s go drag Pete off the job and get dinner and a movie, my treat.”

 “That sounds heavenly, but I doubt we’ll shake him from Spider-Man’s trail if he thinks there’s a good chance for an amazing photo,” Loki said. “We all have our obsessions.”

 “Tell  me about it,” Harry said. “Come on, let’s at least get some coffee, still on me. Order whatever overpriced caffeinated nonsense you like.”

 “I’m worried at the fact that you’re both caffeinating so heavily before you’re out of high school,” Loki said. “I’ve never actually had it myself and I function just fine.”

 “We’ve got standardized tests soon,” Harry said. “All hail the nonsense of SATs and shit…”

 “I’ve been told they’re quite worthless,” Loki said.

 “They are,” Harry agreed. “But if we score well enough now we won’t have to take them senior year.”

 “Ah, always good,” Loki said. “Very well, my young friend. Coffee it is.”

 They’d only just gotten their drinks when Loki’s phone buzzed. “It’s May…Peter hasn’t come home yet…”

 “Chasing Spider-Man, no doubt,” Harry said.

 “Yes but he’s not answering her calls,” Loki mused, sipping the milkshake he’d gotten. He’d felt more like sweets than stimulants. He thought up an excuse. “Battery probably died and he doesn’t even know it…”

  “Crap,” Harry said. “We could find out where Spider-Man’s been, look around?”

 “Ah, ah, ah, I am not leading a minor into potential danger,” Loki said. “You call the _Bugle_ to ask if he’s checked in with them and then go see May. Help her stay calm. I’ll go looking. I’m an adult, I can do that.”

 “Fine,” Harry sighed. “I’m sure my father would thank you for reminding me to be _responsible_.”

 Loki grimaced, “Whatever works. Let me know if the _Bugle_ says anything.”

 Was Loki ever going to give it to Peter for this one…he knew he had to check in!

.o.o.o.

 Spider-Man was stunned at just how much stuff was underground in NYC. Sure you had the things everyone knew about—the subway tunnels, the parking, but this was getting nuts. A whole lab complex? The goblin had outdone himself!

 “Spider.”

 “AH!” Spider-Man yelped, spinning to see Loki. “How did my spider sense miss that?”

 “I mean you no harm?” Loki offered dryly. “Wait, no I don’t, not this time. Do you have _any_ idea what time it is?”

 “Uh, seven? Ish?” Spider-Man offered. He’d been underground a little while.

 “Nearly nine. Your aunt is frantic,” Loki said, folding his arms and scowling.

 “Shoot. Guess there’s no cell service down here,” Spider-Man muttered. “Look, Loki. The Green Goblin stole some sort of energy device, we have to find it! They think he’s using it to make a super bomb.”

 “Who is they?” Loki asked.

 “SHIELD,” Spider-Man said. “Secret agent types. Very high up stuff.”

 Loki frowned and closed his eyes. He pointed, “Larger energy signature that way. Move your spandex clad posterior already, your aunt is worried.”

 “Okay, okay,” Spider-Man said. “…Sorry I made you guys worry.”

 “You should be,” Loki sniffed. “So we’re expecting a bomb and you thought ‘oh, I shall just run at it?’ or something?”

 “Don’t be a prick,” Spider-Man said.

 “I’ll be whatever I want. I actually have the moral high ground this time,” Loki said. “…There’s no one else down here.”

 “What?” Spider-Man asked.

 “No one else is down here,” Loki said. “If the energy signature I’m seeking is correct, then the Goblin must have left the energy device behind…so yes, probably a bomb.”

 “Can your mojo do anything about bombs?” Spider-Man asked.

 “In my weakened state I’d really rather not push it,” Loki said.

 “Great. We just…that’s it?” Spider-Man asked. “That is the lamest, most pathetic bomb setup I’ve ever seen!”

 “Maybe he’s not a good enough scientist to use the energy whatever-it-is,” Loki offered. “Let’s grab it, help the secret agents, and deliver you to your poor dear aunt and worried best friend.”

 “Yeah,” Spider-Man said, going to disconnect the glowing cube from the device. “Seriously this thing is so basic, I-”

 His Spider Sense went off. He’d barely yelled a warning to Loki when an explosion—another bomb, it was all a trap!—went off and buried them.

 Okay, not crushed. That was good. Spider-Man held up the cube to see.

 Several ice pillars, jutting at random angles, seemed to have caught most of the rubble.

 “…Apparently I can do that,” Loki said numbly. It was hard to tell since the light was also blue, but Spider-Man thought he was blue again. Yeah, his eyes were red. Darn. That was going to suck. Loki was very firm about not talking about the blue thing.

 “Well good job on doing it,” Spider-Man offered.

 “What went off?” Loki asked. He was clearly trying to pull himself together, probably to make the blue go away.

 “A second bomb. He must have realized he couldn’t use the cube like he wanted and just made it bait for a trap. Cut his losses,” Spider-Man said. “Guy’s clever but I’ll admit I wouldn’t peg him as any kind of genius. So he probably couldn’t work it.”

  “What the nine hells even is _it_?” Loki asked. “What were you told of it?”

 “Just…some otherworldly energy source. They called it an artifact,” Peter said, holding it out. Maybe Loki might know more. He was the magic man here. “So I’m guessing the scientists found some magic to use.”

 “That looks…very much like something I’d see in Asgard,” Loki said, peering at it.

 “Think it’s safe to give back to the suits?” Spider-Man asked.

 Loki took it, “It looks harmless enough; probably just some energy reposit…tory…”

 “Loki?” Spider-Man asked. “Loki!”

 Loki flung it across the cavern like it burned him. Spider-Man winced but thankfully nothing happened as it hit the ground. He grabbed it with a web and carefully dropped it into the case Agent Coulson had given him. “Loki, come on man!”

 “That’s not from here,” Loki breathed.

 “Yeah, you…you said as much,” Spider-Man said.

 “It’s…he wants it,” Loki said.

 “Who wants it?” Spider-Man asked.

 “I have to…I need to…get away from it,” Loki said. “I have to go.”

 “Loki!” Spider-Man yelled but he was already gone. “Damn it…”

 Spider-Man dug himself out of the rubble slowly—pausing to send his aunt a text that he was so sorry, he got sidetracked tracking Spidey and lost track of time and his phone was on silent please, please forgive him—only to be faced with Phil Coulson and several armed agents. “Oh…hey. Got my call?”

 “We did,” Coulson said. “I’m glad you’re alright. The whole building went down so fast…”

 “There was a big air pocket around the Goblin’s bomb,” Spider-Man said. “The, uh, big bomb he wanted your thing for, not the one that brought down the building. There were two bombs, I mean.”

 “I gathered. Thanks for returning this,” Agent Coulson said, taking the case. “We’ll do our best to make sure you aren’t blamed for anything that went wrong today.”

 “Sure,” Spider-Man said. “So, um, get the suits to stop pointing guns at me?”

 Coulson waved for them to stand down. “You did good work, Spider-Man. If SHIELD needs you in the future, we know who to ask.”

 Right, a high school guy in a spandex spider costume would be needed by SHIELD in the future. They wouldn’t even have needed him _now_ if it hadn’t been in New York and Iron Man wasn’t off the grid. “Sure. Look, I’ve got to get back somewhere soon, or my alibi falls through…” Sure that was vague but it still sounded solid, right?

 “That’s fine. You need a lift?” Coulson asked.

 “No, but you have change for a pay phone?”

.o.o.o.

 Loki’s fingers dug in his hair. This was bad. This was bad, bad, bad, bad-

_Rocks seemingly hovering suspended in a void of stars-_

 So very, very bad and damn it his head-

  _Something, no someone, powerful, so powerful-_

 He was shaking now, shivering, and not from the cold he no longer felt-

  _It wanted something, something on this world, it wanted…conquest?_

 Loki screwed his eyes shut and tried to force his thoughts to order. What could he get from this? What could he _know_ from what the cube had shown him?

 There was a realm, removed from the nine he knew. It was possibly connected to other realms as well. That realm, on the other hand, knew of Midgard and of the Cube…was it their cube, perhaps? It seemed so similar to something one would find in Asgard; that was why he’d tagged along, because it had intrigued him in its similarities…

 No, no, back to facts, Loki, back to facts-

  _A throne, a throne looking out over those stars-_

 Damn it the visions were flitting back in. He rubbed his temples.

 There was someone in that new realm who knew the things he’d sensed they knew. That someone, or maybe some other someone, but he damn well thought it was the someone he sensed, wanted something from Midgard…or beyond Midgard. Maybe he needed the something from Midgard to go beyond Midgard?

 He was getting nowhere; there was a wall at that point. Part of him mused that after over half a year on it one would think he’d start calling Midgard ‘Earth.’ Oh well.

 What if he focused on that someone, that presence?

  _Wants Death, wants Death, wants Death, rule all, rule Death-_

 He really hoped that was merely the insanity Peter usually accused him of making him imagine things. It had not looked pretty.

 Loki flopped back, ignoring how Peter’s unmade ball of sheets dug into his spine. It felt so painful just remembering what he’d seen in that brief, tiny connection. Why? Memories had pain, to be certain he was living proof of that, but not this sort of agony that was practically physical… He rolled over, his head nearly going off one corner—wow, Peter had such a small bed-

 “Loki?”

 Loki’s eyes snapped open to stare at the carpet. Said carpet was quickly joined by a pair of ragged sneakers. “Spider.” Damn, it had come out choked-

 “What’s wrong?”

 -and now Peter was worried. Lovely. “I’m not entirely sure…what happened with the cube?”

 “Back where it belongs,” Peter said. “Far away from people it can hurt, if that’s what you’re wondering.”

 “Peter, I believe we have a situation.”

 “Why?” Peter asked, hopping onto the wall when it was clear Loki wasn’t going to move off the bed.

 “Do you believe in other worlds?”

 “I’m talking to a pain in the neck from one, so yes,” Peter said. “Not counting what I’ve heard from Dr. Strange.”

 “Oh, have I told you how lovely it is to talk to someone who doesn’t require massive explanations? You are a joy,” Loki said, sitting. “The cube is not of this world.”

 “Is it from Asgard?” Peter asked. “You said it looked like it.”

 “No. From beyond the Nine Realms,” Loki said. “And the person I think is its owner is a threat.”

 “The person you _think-_ ”

 “It _hurts_ to think about it too much,” Loki said. “Somehow, something…something within me…connected with the cube. And its owner—supposed owner, whatever—knows of it. And knows it’s here.”

 “…See Doctor Strange after breakfast?” Peter suggested.

 “Good plan,” Loki agreed. “Very…very good plan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Loki was wallowing so much he missed Harry and May chewing Peter out downstairs. Oh well. 
> 
> We're moving towards the plot for Avengers now! The cube is in play, and Loki knows Thanos wants it...without knowing who the hell Thanos even is. Meanwhile Peter continues to prove that being a teenager superhero can worry your friends and relatives and Agent Coulson is on the case of yet another hero. 
> 
> Next time: Dr. Strange has theories, Loki has to admit some things, and the fact that Peter could use a summer internship is worked into their plan.


	7. Out of This World

 “I don’t _know_ what realm it’s in!” Loki groaned, digging his fingers into his hair. “We have been over this!”

 “You can practically paint a picture of the void in which he sits but you can’t tell me where that could be?” Dr. Strange demanded.

 “And now we see why the good doctor is _not_ a psychologist,” Wong said as Loki slammed a fist down onto a table and the arguing continued.

 “You know with how he knew Loki’s magic issues were emotion based and thus, you know, Loki is having issues with that kind of thing, you’d think he’d know better,” Spider-Man said as Dr. Strange threw his hands into the air.

 “Oh I’ve heard his bedside manner during his surgeon days was dreadful,” Wong said, sipping tea as Loki stormed over to Strange and got in his face.

 “Huh. Go figure,” Spider-Man said. “Still, any ideas for getting them off this topic? They’ve been going in circles for forever.”

 “The doctor has always been like this. Once he has an idea he must pursue it until it is exhausted,” Wong said. “It drove the Ancient One to fits sometimes. And caused him to camp in the library a lot as an initiate. It’s how we met.”

 “Yay, and I thought Loki’s family issues were fun, now we have Dr. Strange being obsessive at the wrong time,” Spider-Man said. “I’ll go back to the adoption trauma now, please.”

 “Spider!” Loki groaned. “Don’t just _tell_ people!”

 “You’re adopted?” Dr. Strange asked.

 “By the hoary hosts of Hogath, you actually distracted him,” Wong said, setting down his teacup.

 “How about you go back to claiming I’m lying about the throne and the stars,” Loki muttered.

 “No, perhaps your inability to recall the vision is related to the block on your magic. We know the block is emotional and thus some big personal upheaval, like learning you’re adopted, could cause it. I’ve suspected that as the God of Lies you could perhaps fall back on lies as a defense mechanism, and thus are lying to yourself-”

 “Shut up!” Loki said sharply.

 “Doc, that’s probably not helping…” Spider-Man warned, coming forward.

 “Wait…are _all_ of your issues because you’re adopted?” Dr. Strange asked, slowly tiling his head as he started at Loki ad tapped his chin.

 Loki lunged for him. Spider-Man quickly used a web to grab him before he could reach the doctor and yanked him backwards.

 “Loki, knock it off!” Spider-Man said as Loki landed on his backside and angrily scrambled to his feet. “I know it’s that too, so seriously, _talk to us_! What is wrong? What can’t you admit to yourself about this?”

 “There’s nothing to admit!” Loki barked.

 Wong scoffed, “Then we wouldn’t be in this situation and you would not be without most of your magic. Liesmith, so lying to yourself will only prolong your troubles.”

 “I’m not lying!” Loki yelled.

 “Then tell me how you came to this realm!” Dr. Strange said. “Tell me the truth!”

 “I told you! I fell off the Bifrost!” Loki said.

 “And I tell you that you are _lying_!” Dr. Strange replied, tapping the All-Seeing Eye of Agamoto.

  “Everyone shut up!” Spider-Man yelled. When the two sorcerers stared him down he jerked his chin up defiantly, “Yeah, I said it. Loki, how did you fall?”

 “Spider-Man, he is ly-” Dr. Strange shut up when Wong gave him a look. “Fine. Loki, tell us.”

 “We…we were…fighting. Thor and I.”

 “You were fighting your brother?” Spider-Man asked.

 “I…I…” Loki said. “I had recently found I was adopted…and did something foolish. Trying to prove myself a son of Asgard…I…I did something…something wrong.”

 Spider-Man didn’t have magic like the other three, but even he felt something shift as Loki said it.

 “I…it shouldn’t have come to that. Not at all,” Loki said. “I…it got out of hand…everything…got out of…out of hand…”

 “This started before the fight, then,” Wong said, tapping his chin as he seemed to shift through what Loki was saying. “Before the fall.”

 “Yes,” Loki said. “Thor…he was going to be made king. He _wasn’t_ ready. Spider-Man is more mature any day of the week than he was then. So I decided to prove it…I let men from an enemy realm into Asgard, knowing they would not succeed in their mission but even so that Thor would overreact-”

 “You did what?” Spider-Man asked.

 “I set up a situation for Thor to overreact to,” Loki said.

 “Your plan for proving your brother immature was ‘oh I shall let enemy agents into our realm’? _Really_?” Wong asked slowly.

 “What?” Loki asked.

 “That sounds…quite immature,” Dr. Strange said. “I mean I assumed you had the maturity of a teenager anyway given your choice of friends, but…”

 “I’m not immature!” Loki said.

 “You are so immature,” Spider-Man said, shaking his head as he remembered every little trick Loki played whenever the man got the slightest bit bored. “You are almost scarily immature.”

 “What?” Loki asked softly.

 “Dude, I’m not kicking you or anything here,” Spider-Man said, reaching out and putting a hand on Loki’s shoulder. He sighed as Loki shrugged it off. “It’s just a character flaw. Everyone has one. Like how you rag on my for my alleged guilt complex.”

 “It’s not alleged but we’re talking about Loki today,” Wong added.

 “It’s alleged!” Spider-Man said.

 “This isn’t about _you_ ,” Wong said pointedly.

 “I’m _saying_ this isn’t about hitting you when you’re down,” Spider-Man told Loki. “We want to _help_ you. You’re my friend, man. When I say you’re immature, I don’t mean I hate you or anything. Just that yeah, you’re immature.”

 “Shh, I think he needs a moment,” Dr. Strange said.

  Loki stood stone still, staring at nothing.

 “…Did I break him?” Spider-Man asked, panicking. Loki was always weird, sure, but this was just unsettling! Was Loki’s state of mind more fragile than he’d realized? Oh no, this was all his fault…and thinking that was _not_ proof he had a guilt complex, if Wong had somehow developed mind-reading powers. “Loki?”

 “I…I…” Loki said slowly before shaking his head and stopping. It was almost half a minute before he said, very softly, “I was…I was just as bad as he was, wasn’t I?”

 “None of us were there so…maybe?” Spider-Man offered.

 “It was a game to me too, wasn’t it?” Loki asked. “I thought it was the right move to make and did not consider the consequences beyond those for my brother and that started the trouble. I…I let enemies into Asgard. My whole plan hinged on my letting enemies into Asgard and I didn’t stop to think that it was a bad idea when that was a requirement.”

 “You’re looking a little shaky there,” Spider-Man said. “Let me get a chair…”

 “This is all may fault,” Loki said. “It was…it wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t…I wouldn’t even _know_ I’d been…adopted…that everything was a lie…everything about me was a lie…”

 “Well your being lied to wasn’t your fault, even if how you found out was,” Dr. Strange said, conjuring a chair right behind Loki before Spider-Man had finished walking to get one. “And the lies led to the fight did they?”

 “Yes, we…we fought. Thor destabilized the bridge to stop me from…from…I did something bad,” Loki said. “Something…foolish. I hurt a lot of people trying to prove myself, prove I belonged where I was…I hurt a lot of people…I was wrong.”

 “So Thor destabilized the bridge and you fell?” Spider-Man asked.

 “He broke it while it was under us both,” Loki said. “We both fell off…fa-Odin. Odin caught us.”

 “So if Odin caught you, how did you end up here?” Dr. Strange asked. “You clearly fell between worlds.”

 “I…I told him. I told Odin why I did what I did. That it was for all of us. For him,” Loki said. “He…told me no. I don’t know what he even said it about, if he was calling me a liar or telling me I was wrong or…he just told no…”

 “You didn’t fall,” Spider-Man said as it dawned on him. “You let go.”

 “I…yes,” Loki said. “I felt let go and so let go. I let myself fall. I…I may have just been hoping that would be the end of it, even, but it wasn’t…”

 He looked at Spider-Man. “And then I felt the fall could go two ways, leaned towards the one that was dark instead of cold…I didn’t want the cold it was…it was…”

 “Too much like the blue thing?” Spider-Man asked.

 “In a way, yes,” Loki said. “And then I landed on top of you and interrupted your valiant battle. And you were kind to me. And told me when I was being a jerk. And were my friend and…and I needed that. I needed you and our…mutual other friend and Wong and the doctor. I needed people who didn’t know who I was so I could try and put things together…so I could come to this realization that…that quite a lot of it was really my fault, after all.”

 Spider-Man reached over and hugged Loki, who took it gratefully.

 “Thank you,” Loki said. “I should not have burdened you with it but thank you for helping.”

 “You’re not that awful, just kind of needy sometimes,” Spider-Man said. “Our mutual friend’s been there too, you know.”

 Heck maybe that was why Loki and Harry got on so well. Affection starved guys with less than stellar dads who gravitated towards nerdy little Peter Parker as nonthreatening enough to not hurt them but strong enough to keep up.

 “I got that feeling, yes,” Loki said as Spider-Man stepped back. “I’m just glad that-”

 He stopped, frowning. “The cold place. The other place I could have gone. That…that is the place with the stars. The throne. I’m sure of…damn it!”

 Loki pinched the bridge of his nose and sat down as another headache hit him.

 “Maybe that is why the cube connected to you,” Dr. Strange said. “The person who wants to collect it also wanted to collect _you_ at one point…”

 “What use am I to someone who wants death?” Loki said. “Sure, I can kill people, but there are many across the nine realms more capable of that than I am.”

 “They don’t merely want death, they want death and the cube,” Wong said. “Perhaps they intended you to use it?”

 “You can walk between worlds, or could,” Spider-Man said, remembering Loki’s story. “And the cube is power. Maybe power going between worlds since they’re in another world?”

 “Of course,” Loki said. He began drawing symbols in the air, “The person wants something from beyond Midgard but wants the cube for it. My knowledge of walking between realms could be used to have the cube make a door of some sort in order to move between the worlds…”

 “Thus opening anywhere in the entire cosmos for conquest, I see,” Dr. Strange said standing and making his own glowing, floating symbols. “And with conquest comes the death they seek. Perhps even the point of conquest _is_ death!”

 “No, no, death is the goal but death is also something separate, as if there are two deaths…are there two deaths? The thing and…the form of the thing?” Loki asked. “Whay’s the word, what’s the word..the word for when a thing is a thing? Urg that sounded terrible…”

 “You mean when a thing is represented, perhaps?” Wong asked, joining in. “When a concept is personified?”

 “Anthropomorphization, maybe? Of…of death?” Spider-Man asked. “Like…like Death is a person?”

 “I like the word so let’s say yes,” Loki said. “If Death is a person-”

 “I know many with near-death experiences have described a woman,” Dr. Strange interjected. “As if she was death itself or the grim reaper.”

 “Yes, I have heard of the reaper!” Loki said enthusiastically. “So, so the reaper is a woman and is death…I don’t know where I was going with that, I’m sorry.”

 “Well, have any of you ever tried to impress a girl?” Wong asked. “To show you liked her?”

 “We’re assuming a massively powerful force in the cosmos is crushing on the personification of death and wants to woo ‘her’ by killing people…” Dr. Strange mused. “This is fascinating.”

 “We need to know more about the cube,” Spider-Man said. “If we learn about it maybe we can stop them from using it!”

 “Yes but we no longer have the cube or know anything about it beyond what you two know already,” Dr. Strange said.

 “We need to find people who might know, then,” Wong said. “I shall reach out to our other mystical contacts…Loki, I’d assume you don’t want to, but could you perhaps contact Asgard?”

 “Might not do us any good, the bridge is broken, remember?” Spider-Man said.

 “There must be some way to fix it,” Dr. Strange said and suddenly his golden floating diagrams looked almost like web searches, with articles and notes flickering in the air. “There’s plenty of interdimensional bridges in the cosmos, gentlemen, fixing it isn’t beyond the realm of the possible.”

 “There was that nice man from outer space, ah, Krugarr? He knew about bridges,” Wong said.

 “Who’s that? Can we ask them for help?” Spider-Man asked.

 “He’s a serpentine red fellow from outer space. Very charming, career thief though,” Dr. Strange said. “Stole one of my favorite clocks for his friend’s birthday. Still, he might help…oh this one is from earth…”

 “Hey, this is a scientist…she calls it an Einstein-Rosen Bridge but this…looks like what you’ve told me, Loki,” Spider-Man said, peering at the floating illusion of a web advertisement. It was a bit hard to read with the text all in gold but he managed anyway.  

 “She’s looking for an intern in the summer, Spider Man! You’re a man of science, this could work!” Dr. Strange said. “She wants to build a bridge, if you gave her the data Loki has she could maybe instead repair it…we fix the Bifrost and she gets to write one hell of a paper, everyone’s happy-”

 “That is Jane Foster,” Loki said as Dr. Strange enlarged the writing and the image along with it.

 “…You know her?”

 Loki cringed, “I…ah…nearly had Thor killed in front of her.”

 “We really should have just gotten you a therapist, huh?” Spider-Man groaned. “We are clearly, _clearly_ not qualified for helping with this kind of thing.”

 “I found the internship posting,” Wong said, handing Spider-Man a StarkPad.  “I think you’re either completely qualified or could at least leak some information Loki gives you to _seem_ completely qualified. And internships look great on college applications.”

 “So…is this your plan?” Dr. Strange asked.

 “Yeah,” Spider-Man said. “It’s a couple months to summer, so then we’ll go to the desert, meet this Dr. Foster, and help her fix the bridge. And Loki can work on figuring out what to do with his family stuff with a qualified therapist.”

 “I don’t think we’ll find one who we can actually explain the situation to,” Loki said. “…I’ll manage.”

 “Okay. I’ll help,” Spider-Man said. “Now let’s get home so you can help me get hired for this internship!”

 “I’ve got a few colleagues in the paranormal physics field,” Dr. Strange said. “I’ll see if any of them would be good to recommend you.”

.o.o.o.

 “Okay so how’s this look for a basic write up of bridge physics?” Peter asked, passing Loki his notes.

 “…Focus a little more on the wormhole effect,” Loki said. “It should be good beyond that.”

 He felt drained. Coming to the conclusion that he had…it was a shock but after the shock there was just no energy.

 Thor had been right. Thor had somehow grown up in his time on earth while Loki had remained the same, and that same had been just as immature as his brother before the fall, only a less-visible sort of immaturity due to their differing personalities.

  Then he’d found out he was a monster and…well…apparently in trying not to be a monster he’d only proved he was one.

 What was he even supposed to do now? Well if nothing else he had a place here. Peter was too kind hearted and Dr. Strange too invested in his role as steward to wayward magic users to kick him out. And he like them. Them and Wong and Harry and May. So…so even if he could never fix what he’d done, if things could not be mended with Asgard…he had here.

 “You okay, Loki?” Peter asked.

 “I think I will be,” Loki said. He smiled and conjured a small hunk of pyrite which he began to alchemically transform into various other stones. Far easier than it would have been even this morning. Dr. Strange was right, not admitting the truth to himself had been part of the problem…

  “Do you…do you think there’s a way to let Asgard know what we’re doing? So they keep an eye on their end of the bridge?” Peter asked as he sealed up his application, notes, and two letters written by Dr. Strange’s acquaintances in paranormal science highly recommending him as a favor to Strange. Peter had complained of sending it “snail mail” but the doctor had needed physical letter so a spell could be placed on them to make them match Peter’s name in private, to hide his identity from others.

 “…I suppose,” Loki admitted. “It would pretty much require my yelling ‘Hey, look at me! Down here!’ But yes.”

  “You ready for that?” Peter asked.

 “Not…really, no,” Loki admitted. “But I have to do it. If we’re to stop the death-lover who wants the cube and is planning to come and get it.”

 “You sure though?” Peter asked.

  “I want to…protect this world, this place,” Loki said finally. “You, Harry, May, Wong, Strange…you are my friends. My only friends. You helped me reclaim my magic and my mind, helped me when I lost my way. I _will_ return the favor.”

 “Loki, you don’t have to, you know, hurt yourself over us just being your friends,” Peter said.

 “Go mail your application, Peter,” Loki said with a small smile. “I have a call to make.”

 As soon as the boy was gone, Loki took a deep breath, teleported to a random roof, and removed his cloaking spell. “Hiemdall, we need to talk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So they know a little more about Thanos, and no, in this universe the All Seeing Eye of Agamatto is not an infinity stone. I'll come up with something else for the time stone eventually. And the mind stone because the reality stone is going to be in play for Avengers instead of it. You'll see. 
> 
> Next time: Asgard finds out Loki lives, and Peter and Loki pack for an internship.


End file.
